Okay. What.

I decided to watch this movie after noting the title on James Garner's IMDb page. It was from the '60s and I had never seen it. EXTRAORDINARY. Then, I saw that it costarred Angie Dickinson (queen of my heart!) and Dick Van Dyke and was some kind of ridiculous, crazy, slightly "edgy" comedy from the 1960s: MY FAVORITE.

Little did I know.

Okay, guys. Have I ever steered you wrong about any movie ever?

No.

(No one who has watched Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine has ever regretted it.)

Guys. GUYS. GUYS! You need to go watch The Maze. It's on Netflix (only until the 15th, when the rest of my Netflix queue disappears forever), it's on YouTube (I think). I'm sure it's everywhere. I'm too lazy to go look. But, I'm sure there are many ways that you can watch this film both legally and slightly-less-than-what-is-necessarily-legal.

PLEASE GO WATCH IT!

You won't be able to appreciate the full magnitude of my delirious excitement unless you too have experienced the "The Twist" (you heard it hear first: best twist ever).

So, I have a lot to say. In fact, I ACTUALLY TOOK NOTES WHILE WATCHING THIS FINE FILM. I wrote random musings and quotes in my Kindle (name: Percy) as it went; but, apparently, I titled the notes with Broken Arrow instead of The Naked Spur. No idea why. I've never even seen Broken Arrow. JIMMMMYYY! *shakes fist*

And that brings me to why I have so much to say. I mean, I often have a lot to say.

It's a very odd movie. And the only real review I could find of it online described it as "pretentious." And, I totally get that. But, it's also perfect.

You know when you're little you have more endurance than God is ever to grant you again.

Children are man at his strongest.

They abide.

So, yeah. {Spoilers ahead, of course.}

I had only seen a few bits and pieces of Compulsion before, so I was SUPER-excited to see it tonight! (Orson Welles + Bradford Dillman? HECK YEAH.)

It was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

I watched The Mini-Skirt Mob for Sherry Jackson, because she's one of my favorite TV actresses. And she was quite cool in this...even if she did get the abused character. She kept getting beaten up, gagged and tied, almost blown up with Molotov cocktails, forced to trek through the scorching desert on foot, AND basically run over with a motorcycle. The person responsible for this madness? The Face of Pure Evil.

I think my brain is going to explode.

Who decided it would be a good thing to let me watch a movie so obviously far above what her viewing comprehension level will EVER BE?! Who?!

I almost ALWAYS only write actual semi-reviews for films I utterly loved, films I utterly hated, or films that are completely and brilliantly idiotic. I never blog about harmless, forgettable movies (for those I write a couple sentences on my 2011 in Film page). But, I have to with Jessica....because I don't even know whether I'm supposed to love it or hate it or ridicule it. I AM HOPELESSLY CONFUSED.

Ring of Fire is a '60s film. It stars David Janssen. It has an epic theme song. It has sullen, punk gangster teenagers (led by Frank Gorshin...which is just weird). IT TAKES PLACE AND WAS FILMED IN WASHINGTON. GLORIOUS WASHINGTON.

The Wheeler Dealers (1963) was a truly a movie MADE for James Garner! I mean, who else could play a Boston born, Yale-educated conman who has everyone thinking he's a sweet, little Texan boy...with such charm?!I

I was super-excited to see this film! I had put it on hold at my library, and it came in today. I was already planning on watching it very soon, but some occurrences at dinner made me watch it RIGHT AWAY!

Earlier, I accidentally stabbed myself in the foot with a pitchfork thing. (Don't ask!) There is currently a hole in my toe.

Then, I got food poisoning from my dinner.

I don't even know why everything is ALWAYS STINKIN' HAPPENING TO ME!

Anyway, I did remember that I had Modesty Blaise